We’ve been taught to believe as women that “marriage is our greatest achievement”…so we go into relationships, quite literally “hunting” for the ultimate prize…marriage…and in my experience this has been so destructive…I am not defined by my ability to convince a man to “put a ring on it”…My worth and value is not attached to a man wanting to say “I do” or “I don’t” to me in front of my family, friends and a bunch of other randomers who turned up for the food or the drinks or both or just to stare…
I define myself…who I am, what I want, what I do…and I get satisfaction when I live up to my own standards of what it means to be an awesome human being…which necessarily means being kind, considerate, thoughtful, generous, loving in way that does not compromise my dignity or the dignity of others, giving, receiving with grace and gratitude, knowing, learning, exploring, understanding, being open to new experiences, and importantly being open to different and diverse ways of being…
So don’t let society dictate what your greatest achievement as a woman ought to be…do that for yourself…and you’ll find that living up to your own expectations of who you think you are, what you deserve, and how you ought to be will come so much more naturally to you…
maggiemuthama 